I am from the Do or Die... Never Ran. Never Will. (Unless of course... they shootin') Easy!"
August 25, 2005
KIT for KAT
DISCLAIMER: To all the men out there, arm yourselves
with one of these!!!
Boy what a difference a day makes, cause today my momentum is L-o-o-w. Just not feeling it today. Actually I not feeling for people, and I'm on a very short fuse, so I hope my "micro managing" boss stays away!
Side note: Don't you just hate "micro managers..." Have you ever thought of knocking your boss' block off??? What about a dear unsupsecting associate, or flaky friend. Why is during this time of the month, we women feel to tell the god "awful" truth to someone, in the most "blunt" of ways (whom I'm kidding, I'm blunt everyday).
What was the big deal about this apple that Eve bit, that we women are still serving her felon sentence to this day???? What was in it darn apple anyway,
Eden version of "pcp?"
(Last I checked an apple was suppose to be good for ya) But... no God saw it other wise, and thus sentenced Eve/Women to be aware of our bodies, endure God awful labor pains, and have a monthly "horrid" reminder called our PERIODS... where in much we get to express our gratitude for this gift from Eve, with feelings of: sadness, anger, lost, down, clingy, worried, woke-up-this-morning-and-got-myself-gun, junk food cravings, not to mention the different degrees of menstrual cramps, and one tell tale sign that the gift is coming from Eve each month is our "MOODINESS." (Pay attention fellas, I had a roomate who use to mark mine and his girlfriends time down on his calendar, and stay clear those days. Smart guy).
Now what did God give all the "Adams" of the world, oh took it easy on them.
Morning Hard Ons, Jock Itch, occasional Blue Balls (and I due mean occasional, cause you can always call "Hannah" and her five sisters). Oh yeah and how could I forget he sentened them to watch PORNO. Way to Go God! Look out for your Boyz.
If I remember correctly Adam bit the damn apple too, which makes him an accomplice, he should of gotten a stiffer sentence, oh yeah (some of) ya'll did (Receding Hairlines, and mid life crisis... can't say the trade off is fair) But then again, I've seen some of ya'll behind the ear hair lines... lol!
All right God we're even.
(By the way...Are you a woman? lol)
Sssh! she's writing.. brooklyn babe8/25/2005 
30 Comments:
  • At 25/8/05 3:18 PM, Blogger Jdid said…

    hey morning hard ons and jock itch are serious issues lol

     
  • At 25/8/05 6:37 PM, Blogger Didi Roby said…

    Thanks for your words of wisdom on my spot.

    You cracked me up!! with this one.

    You changed your pic I see.

    I'm still reading!! bb:)

     
  • At 25/8/05 11:51 PM, Blogger Motherhood is Here said…

    TOTALLY! I am so there, TODAY. I am ready to knock everyone's chip off except for mine. It is amazing how much power PMS has. You left a comment on my blog, asking about Firework...no, I don't work in that. I have never been taught in any program so just play around in them really messily. Do you design? What is it that you do?

     
  • At 26/8/05 12:14 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I heard that girl!!!! I'm luvin the PMS survival kit up top. Classic!

     
  • At 26/8/05 2:07 AM, Blogger HighMaintenanceHussy said…

    LOL Sing it, sistah! ;)

     
  • At 26/8/05 2:08 AM, Blogger Cutie Cola said…

    Don't get me started on PMS issues! It's just not fair. I get so emotional and moody that I don't recognize myself at times. The best part of PMS for me (Yes! There's a good part to it) is that I get horny as hell!! :-)

     
  • At 26/8/05 8:31 AM, Blogger The Foxybrown Show said…

    LOL LOL LOL
    Speechless!

     
  • At 26/8/05 11:57 AM, Blogger UberGoober said…

    Brooklyn,

    Two and counting! *GRIN*

     
  • At 26/8/05 9:56 PM, Blogger Msnhim said…

    All I Can say is AMEN!!!!!!!!!!!!

     
  • At 27/8/05 12:42 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I love love love the survival kit! lol

    Great post. I think men suffer from their own version of PMS and emotionally it's worse than ours. lol

     
  • At 27/8/05 6:11 PM, Blogger winterssoulstyce said…

    did u say behind the ear hairlines???! lmao!

     
  • At 27/8/05 7:23 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Goose-stepping with the Commission
    Up-starts, up-smarts and other cranks & dilettantes adorn a media scene once renown for excellence, so this journal will attempt to point out the more obvious foibles of the local press to our gentle readers ...
    Discover guitar lessons - The ultimate guitar blog

     
  • At 27/8/05 7:24 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Napoleon Dynamite pens nixed
    From Terri Mauro , Your Guide to Parenting Special Needs . FREE Newsletter. Sign Up Now! August 27, 2005 Napoleon Dynamite pens nixed Sweet! The Napoleon Dynamite pens that earned a spot in last Saturday's Hall ...
    Nice blog

    you might be interested in my mesothelioma treatment site

    Keep up the good work

     
  • At 27/8/05 8:04 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    "Software is the soul to the lifeless body of the hardware."
    raspberry and white chocolate cheesecake recipe

     
  • At 28/8/05 12:05 PM, Blogger Luke Cage said…

    Holy sh#@!!!! This was great luv! I knew I was in for a treat when I saw the survival kit the moment I got here. Nice inclusion dear. Yeahhh, good ol' God the creator.

    He sure took it easy on us guys. Then again, he kinda flipped the script and gave us WOMAN, so consider us even..lol.. Geez, I'm gonna get it for that one. Mwwahhh! I finally made it here and my links have been updated. Consider me a new frequent visitor!

     
  • At 28/8/05 2:45 PM, Blogger Laylah Queen of the Night said…

    Dang, I love it.

    I would add to the PMS kit some relexology, Nexxus Humectress, Ginko Biloba (for him) and for that time of the month our cellies should go on free nights and weekend mode.

     
  • At 28/8/05 5:58 PM, Blogger brooklyn babe said…

    This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

     
  • At 28/8/05 6:11 PM, Blogger brooklyn babe said…

    Happy Sunday Folks!
    @ JDid... one is more serious than the other... lol.

    @ Beauty... MUSIC CALMS THE SAVAGE BEAST, AND Let's just say I had a monster in last week.... I had to Angie on here that song it hot... but will change so it wont get too old on ya...

    @ Foxy not you speechless..lol, dayum, there's first. (*jokes*)
    @ your welcome, and thanks, and done.

    @Luke Cage
    Don't get cut Luke... (I think Tina was experiencing that time of the month, when she whupped Ike's ass... lol.) Glad my time has passed, and the sun shine is back shinin' (whew!)
    'Preciate cha' peekin in, and UR blog bud rolled, Right back at cha!).

    All write I was going to hit ya'll up back, but a chick gotta go eat some din, be back in a few...
    time for a station dinner break.

     
  • At 28/8/05 6:38 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Hey not too bad ! Nice blog. I bookmarked it. I have a site Agent Orange mostly about VietNam, agent orange in vietnam and such. Check it out if you get a chance.

     
  • At 28/8/05 6:46 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Sudoku Craze Shows Offline Memes Still Alive and Well
    Recently I discovered Sudoku - a numerical puzzle that's now a genuine worldwide craze .
    Hey, you have a great blog here! I'm definitely going to bookmark you!
    I have a home business site/blog. It pretty much covers home business related stuff.

    Come and check it out if you get time :-)

     
  • At 28/8/05 8:02 PM, Blogger brooklyn babe said…

    This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

     
  • At 28/8/05 8:03 PM, Blogger brooklyn babe said…

    I'm back. And to all you Anonymous Spammers, I'm about to treat ya'll like Nino Brown... and "cancel" ya'll hoes!!!!

     
  • At 28/8/05 8:22 PM, Blogger Chubby Chocolate said…

    Hey there,

    Thanks for the comment. I am in LOVE with Idris Elba (the guy in the Angie video)! He's a West African-Brit who loves big women (so he stated in a magazine article some years back). I LOVE HIM!!!! I want to add him to my blog, but I can't find a good pic of him. You've just made my day...

     
  • At 28/8/05 11:19 PM, Blogger brooklyn babe said…

    "Chubby Chocolate" - OOoo thank's for the name plug... that Brotha... is "F-Y-N-N-E." And he has just taking UPS commercial to a whole new height.
    "What can Brown Do you for you???? " I ask....lmao
    Night!

     
  • At 29/8/05 9:17 AM, Blogger The Foxybrown Show said…

    Happy Monday!
    Welcome back to the work week!

     
  • At 29/8/05 9:33 AM, Blogger chrome said…

    God's got alot to answer to lol. Is it true about the moon and menstrual cycles?

     
  • At 29/8/05 11:20 AM, Blogger Knockout Zed said…

    Do not, I repeat, do not belittle the pain and suffering blue balls has brought to millions of men daily. I do not take this lightly! And no, Miss Palmer is not an apt substitute for "the fertile crescent".

     
  • At 29/8/05 12:24 PM, Blogger Danielle said…

    hey gurl firt time i am hitting your blog up ill be back like the blog and hope your feeling better!

     
  • At 29/8/05 2:43 PM, Blogger Chris said…

    morning hard on's can be taken care of

     
  • At 30/8/05 1:35 AM, Blogger amandaviolet. said…

    I love your blog, and i'd like to agree with you. we definatly got the short straw on god's list of bodily ailments. blue balls and jock itch... haha, those pale in comparison to the cramps and child birth. i'll stop complaining the day a man shoots an 8 lbs child out of his penis.

     
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Home: Somewhere, East Coast, United States
About Me: Brooklyn (Bajan) Brit, who's finally carving her 30's niche, in this world. Look out Oprah here I come!
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