I am from the Do or Die... Never Ran. Never Will. (Unless of course... they shootin') Easy!"
June 07, 2006
Humming...
Humming (n) To sing a melody or song, through a closed mouth. OR to have some breathe that is kicking... a song, no one wants to hear you sing. You smell me?

So I'm on the train the other day, and I smell this tropical fruity kind of watermelon smell.

I sniff out it's direction.

A-ha! Smell detected.

Its coming from this chick standing next to me at the door.

It's chewing gum.

Can I tell you my private fetish with fruity chewing gum... I must devour ALL tropical fruit flavor, I know brand and flavor just by the smell.

Chewing gum phantic that I am, I quickly decided that as soon as I get off the train, I must buy me this gum!!!!

But wait... I'm meeting up with my boy... if this gum was tantilizing my nose hairs, I got to have me some now, so it can be in my walking atmosphere...

So I politely asked the young lady, if she had a peice of gum to spare. She gave me two.

Cool.

Well, since me and boy were doing dinner, I blatantly put my "still-got-flavor" juice on my hand. It'll be dessert. (Yup. No shame. I savor the flavor)

After din... we bid our adues, and I make my way over to the bookstore.

While perusing through the Business section, this dude comes up to me and tries to start a conversation.

Thing is. His breath came up to me FIRST.

Beat him to the punch, thus, I didn't not want to meet him, since he breath killed the intro.

But dude was persistent, and his breathe was even more persistent, relentless even, his breathe didn't give a hoot, that I was offended, on the verge of vomit. About to smack the crap out of him, with each blow he sent my way. And I'm trapped down this aisle.

So I try to take the "higher' less hot air road, and tilt my head to the side, out of direct fire of his breathe. Then I remember!

YOU STILL HAVE A PIECE OF GUM!!!!

Ding!

I make like I have to go in my wallet, and the gum is sititng right there.

I offer.

He takes!

YES! Check mate.

I wait.

And wait.

And WAIT.

Why am I not smelling watermelon... WHY?

His breathe, devoured the whole watermelon flavor... this is bigger than just bad breath here folks! *Shaking my head* And here I thought cleanliness is suppose to be "next" to Godliness... hmph!.

Now I'm pissed.

I had plan on chewing that 2nd piece of gum, now that my flavor was gone from my gum. As I quickly departed from him. My temper slowly started to cool down however, when I got back outside, and resumed chewing on my flavorless gum... ....Ahhhhh thus my watermelon fragrant bliss returns, and so does my calm "fresh" breath mood. Breathe Fresh, Bk Babe
Sssh! she's writing.. brooklyn babe6/07/2006 
18 Comments:
  • At 7/6/06 10:21 PM, Blogger Luke Cage said…

    RARR, RARR, RARR..! Like the Dungeon Draaaagon!!!! Whoa! Not Babe being hit with the a'mighty dragon breath. I bet a sista looked like that Yahoo emoticon with its wide-eyed look and "O" shaped mouth shaking its head from side to side when you got a whiff. At least you're still standing vertically and didn't pass out or else you wouldn't have been able to write this funny post. -lol

     
  • At 8/6/06 2:57 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Dang, that is some serious dragon breath. You needed to refer him to a good dentist, a colonic...something. Ugh!

    -B

     
  • At 9/6/06 10:55 AM, Blogger Chris-el-da said…

    ha ha!
    i feel as though i can't say anything mean about dragon breath boy though because i'm sitting here with morning breath reading this blog before i brush my teeth.

    but... priorities, right?

    so, what kind of gum was it?

     
  • At 9/6/06 11:10 AM, Blogger Miz JJ said…

    I can always tell when I have bad breath? Why can't other people tell when they have bad breath? It's amazing to me. I don't like gum, but I always have these amazingly powerful Starbucks mints with me at all times. Gotta keep it fresh!

     
  • At 9/6/06 2:42 PM, Blogger brooklyn babe said…

    @ Chris-el-da... ORBTIZ tropical watermelon.. Get Some Today!

     
  • At 9/6/06 2:52 PM, Blogger brooklyn babe said…

    IS ANYBODY ELSE HAVEING BLOGGER ISSUES????

    THOUGHT I COULD DO SOME "BLOG BY'S" DURING LUNCH...

    ...oh well... manana.

     
  • At 9/6/06 4:36 PM, Blogger Amadeo said…

    Dag his breath and the gum had a power struggle..that's gotta be halitosis(sp) or something...ask him to drink some holy water or something.

     
  • At 10/6/06 12:47 AM, Blogger Rose said…

    His breath was kicking! That's a stomach problem or something...

     
  • At 11/6/06 2:11 PM, Blogger Delaleuverses said…

    LMAO, this was mad funny, yeah the breath-o-meter is always up for me when some guy steps to me. I don't care if you're as fine as the Rock, your breath best be on point. Lol, and my favorite is Trident's Tropical Fruit punch...lol, this was a great post.

     
  • At 11/6/06 9:06 PM, Blogger Brea said…

    Dayum, that is some bad breath to over power watermelon bubble gum! Lawd, somebody needs to tell him. Made for a funny blog though...

     
  • At 12/6/06 5:26 AM, Blogger obifromsouthlondon said…

    lol. bruce, erm, brooklyn lee starring in "enter the dragon breath" where she defends us all. lol, dutty-mouth man.

    work with this dude who we all call the "one". his "skin teeth" is nasty, stanky and yella. I make a b-line for the door everytime i c him coming.

     
  • At 12/6/06 6:27 AM, Blogger Michael Jones said…

    yea thats interesting. whne i was little i used to chew gum for days, literally, the same piece.lol i know its gross but hopefully you dont feel alone about the gum fetish lol

     
  • At 12/6/06 5:05 PM, Blogger mytruth said…

    lol...his breathe hit you first...lol. You are crazy.

     
  • At 13/6/06 2:58 AM, Blogger Stunner said…

    Damn that's some bad breath! A good chewing gum gone to waste!

     
  • At 13/6/06 11:20 AM, Blogger Serial_Dater said…

    Sounds like a certain Babe in the BK has an oral fixation. ;o)

     
  • At 14/6/06 12:22 AM, Blogger TRUTHZ said…

    ilol...you should have asked him if he had any listerine strips...maybe he would have gotten the hint...and yeah blogger has been acting really janky lately.

     
  • At 15/6/06 11:57 AM, Blogger Msnhim said…

    DAMN the breath was that seriouse? lol

     
  • At 15/6/06 12:03 PM, Blogger nikki said…

    BWAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!

    now THAT is the kinda breath that makes ass smell like flowers.

    and you gave up your piece of gum for it and it didn't work??? i would have been PISSED.

    bad breath is a big deal. i mean, it's not like being ugly. you can turn off the lights and still have sex with an ugly person. but a person with bad breath? you can turn off the lights, close your eyes, even turn away and you STILL gonna smell it. and it's like the bad breath is even stronger when the lights are out. i can't hold my breath for that long...

     
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About Me: Brooklyn (Bajan) Brit, who's finally carving her 30's niche, in this world. Look out Oprah here I come!
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